Barbie and --what?!

Okay, look at this image of an upcoming Barbie line, and guess what the accompanying Direct-to-DVD movie is about:

You're thinking something involving fairies or royalty, right? Maybe a "Barbie does the Wizard of Oz" kind of thing? (Those dresses are giving me serious Glinda vibes. And those are obviously wands they're holding, right?) Well, think one more time before scrolling down.

Think you're ready?

Okay, here it is:

What manner of Tomfoolery is this?! Barbie and the Three Musketeers? I just... there aren't words for my feelings toward this. I mean, I haven't felt this kind of indescribable rage toward any of the Barbie direct-to-DVD movies just from seeing the cover. Maybe if they weren't wearing dresses.... Or if the dolls had the funky hats instead of crowns. Or if the doll's swords didn't look so unswordlike. And that cat with a sword? That's even worse, and makes potentially less sense, than the comic relief owl in that French animated version that I keep meaning to upload.

At the moment, there is hardly any information on the actual plot, nor has a release date been set, although a couple of books are slated to come out in August.